We are so excited to have Katy S. Duffield join us today to share information about Expository Nonfiction Picture Books!
I LOVE a good story. You know the feeling—falling headfirst into a good book with an enticing beginning, a flowing middle, and an oh-so-right ending—only to come out hours later asking: what time is it? Narrative storytelling (whether fiction or nonfiction) has a compelling “pull,” because it typically has conflict, a distinct story arc, and a satisfying ending.
But storytelling wasn’t a good fit for my topic when I was writing my nonfiction picture book, Crossings: Extraordinary Structures for Extraordinary Animals (illustrated by the amazing Mike Orodán). If I’d wanted to write about one particular animal using a certain wildlife crossing, I could have written in a story-oriented narrative style. But what I most wanted was to feature a variety of fascinating crossings along with the wide range of animals that use them, so instead of narrative nonfiction, I knew expository fiction was the way to go.
(*for more about expository and narrative nonfiction, nonfiction structure types, and everything kidlit nonfiction, visit author Melissa Stewart’s website http://www.melissa-stewart.com).
But without “story,” I needed to come up with other ways to pull readers in. I asked myself: How can I write about wildlife crossings in an engaging way? So, I did what I often do—I dove headfirst into the books on my bookshelf. The expository nonfiction books I adore have all kinds of yummy—what I call “extras”—spare text, lyrical language, refrains, and a big dose of heart. These would be the elements that would make my manuscript sing!
Spare Text
The main text of the first manuscript that my editor saw was around 400 words (the book also includes layered text on each spread to expand on what is shown in the main text). Pretty spare, right? But my super-sharp editor had her super-sharp revision scissors at the ready. I’ll admit, I hesitated at first. I’d worked hard on my beginning “set-up” and on my evocative descriptions, but I pruned them even more. And…my editor was right. The final main text clocked in around 250 words and felt much “tighter” overall. Here’s a “before” and “after” example:
Original text:
The roar of the tide calls—a massive wave of red crabs floods the forest floor,
then scuttles up, up and OVER a specially-created crab bridge toward the ocean.
Final text as it appears in the book:
Refrain
Luckily (thankfully!), the refrain I used throughout the book: “Over. Under. Across. Through.” came to me quite early in the process. I wanted the piece to feel “active,” and since the text focuses on the animals’ movement throughout the crossings, using prepositions that denote movement seemed to be an interesting and appropriate choice. As a bonus, the refrain, (along with a focus on poetic word choice) added a lyrical element to the text.
Heart
I knew that the endangered animal topic would have a strong heartstring tug of its own, but I also wanted to highlight the people who care so much about these animals and how they go about helping them. My first attempt was okay, but I felt it needed more, so I kept working on it to find the just-right approach.
Original:
Animal-loving superheroes, don their capes, pick up their pencils, set their minds to Figure. It. Out.
And they come up with ideas, answers—
—Ideas and answers that will help save the world’s animals.
The following is a look at the revised text which has been reworded and tightened and, which now includes the “Over. Under” refrain. The addition of “opening their minds and their hearts” also allowed me to use a version of that phrasing on the final page which helped the text come full circle (bonus!):
For me, studying the elements of books I love can help me see my manuscript in news ways. So, if you’re working on a piece of expository nonfiction, don’t fret that you don’t have a built-in story. Instead, take a look at some of the expository nonfiction books that you love and see what “extras” you can find to enhance your work-in-progress.
Happy writing!